Thing Men Should Know Part 4? Maybe?

Honestly this one is all about surrounding yourself. By what you may ask and I say for what reason you wanna surround yourself should the main thing you think of first. Success is exactly what you want to surround yourself for. Setting yourself up to succeed can come in many forms and one of the forms we men forget is true friends. No friends you have known forever, or grew up with, though they can be true friends. I am talking about those that will forcibly pic you up and slap you around a bit so your take the one step at a time to get back on your feet. I am talking about the true friends who caring, compassion, and love come not only with out strings but with out being asked for, with out reservations. With all the things that have gone on with me as of late I have seen who are truly my friends, ad who I know I could/would go to war with and for. So fellas if you think you got it together and you can’t seem to figure out why the ladies are avoiding you, or why people tend avoid you, take stock of whom you surround yourself with. You are seen by the company you keep, its not fair but if you took better personal inventory you would understand why people make such associations. Just something to think about from the Bear.

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OH Canad- wait….?

Yeah This guy was out and about for bit traveling the world, seeing the sights, drinking beer and eating heart warming poutine. I was in the great white north…..again(fucking alaska) but this time it was Acton, Ontario Canada to rub elbows and cupcakes with FlashPulp‘s own Skinner Co Execs and Jr. Execs. I had a blast we recorded some podcasts and those are both live a running free as well as just enjoyed one another’s company. I can’t wait to go back it was a blast. Yes there are pictures but you gets none… lol ok so you get a few they will come in another post as I don’t have the thumb stick with them on me as I am supposed to be on the road back home but a pit stop at the farm for a couple days is always a good thing. Jrd, Opop, JMay, were wonderful hosts who spent way to fucking much money on me and thus next years balticon they will get ten fold in meat i swear it.

There isn’t much difference between the two countries how ever other than the fact Canadians 1) Can’t not drive 2) are super nice about everything. Other than those two fact there basically the same. All in all in the a fun trip and its been way to fucking long since i been up north and i will definitely try to make this a yearly thing if i can because we went to a Halloween themed amusement park(Jrd stamped it when he decided we need fast lane passes for this thing.) The rollercoasters were fucking insane leviathan my hat is off to you good mechanical beast. JMay you are going in every haunted house we can find by the way next time. We also will try to make it a two day affair next time so we ca get in some of the awesome Halloween shows and events planned.

Well if you want to hear more please stop by FlashPulp for there Flash Cast Minisode featuring Me and Protector of Regina, Throat Punch Janelle. Also you can stop by Talk Nerdy 2 Me or TN2M Facebook Page and hear us go on about horror movies and how Canada invaded my podcast lol. so until next time from the Den Big Bear is out and on the road…again?(yeesh I am out of practice)

What a day…in the life of a mechanically un-inclined nerd bear….

Sigh, I think I have told my friends this numerous times but cars are easy to buy but murder to keep up. I mean seriously I drove to this years Balticon in my truck. It handled the drive lovingly. Theennnn, when we get back there was a change in the air. It all start with…a pop. yes as I was backing out of the drive to head to work there was a pop and my right tired blew out, as I had no time for changing a tire less than 20 minutes before work It had to stay until the am. Not such a bad thing right? right well the geniuses at car companies now use these lovely devices called locking lug-nuts and to remove a tire this beast of man made origin must be conquered. I maybe a rather physically menacing figure when looked at from a general stand point I mean. 6’3 280lbs big and bald well needless to say I was stumped by staggered by the two hit combo of releasing the spare tire from its cage and removing the flat. by the way Chevrolet eat a dick for your asinine spare tire mounting and torture device turned vehicle jack. as I have spotted off such craziness I will illuminate 30 minutes to struggle and wrench these lug-nuts off after a 45 minute cranking of this damned jack to raise the vehicle so it and the bad tire do not fal land crush my poor exhausted self after a shift at work. Now the really killer the spare tire house is a De Vincian device were you have to crank this turny thing to lower the device but at the same time to hve it jacked up and pressing in what your lowering to compress this spring and go back and forth between cranking to lower and lowering the jack to keep continual pressure until the tire literally falls off this industrial strength death cord. now after all is said and done( a nap 3 beers a google search for youtube videos and half a day later) I have released the imprisoned spare tire and with more grunting turning and wrench attached and cast the blown ring of rubber into the pit(bed of my pickup) and lowered the truck back upon the ground to rest were it shall sit for a month because my breaks and rotors are and make a horrible banshee squeel and grinding sound straight form the never ending story rock family. Now after forking over nearly 4 hundred bucks for a replacement tire for the front left(driver side) due to extensive tire wall damage and breaks and rotors for the front my poor baby is almost ready to roll once more just some minor things now like a tune up, and normal time/mileage based maintenance and I can stop driving the mini-can around.

so moral of the story, become a wizard and use brooms, flu powder, and port keys to get around for there cheaper and far less of a pain in my furry nerd bear butt.

Now if you will excuse me I am off to weep and drink some rye as remember this tale has drained me, but dont forget(shameless self promo) to check out My podcast along side Jen, called Talk Nerdy 2 Me rate us and review us on iTunes if you like and or if your feeling froggy stop by the Facebook page and talk with us there we are always posting things and speaking of whatever odd nerdy thing we are into at the moment and would love for you to join us as well and give your likes and share as tribute…I mean wait what do I mean. yeah so just come say hi, and this is Big Bear out until next time.

Balitcon 46–Part 3

I am not going to tag the pic or label them or what every cause there is just way to many Nutty Nuchtchas out did her self. I mean these things are fantastic. As if par for the course you can find Nutty on a few podcasts Nutty Bites and Beyond The Wall(a podcast about game of thrones) so enjoy the shots I know I did also if you wanna see more of them she has like damn near 300 pics on her facebook page. Also a very few are pics of mine from my iphone those are mainly the Erotica Ala Carte Iron Chef getting pics for this without having them be ummmm….well yeah was a bit hard but hey if a Rumba can rise to the challenge so can Big Bear.

 

10 Zombie Movies You Should See…Twice!(It could save your life)

AH Yeah big bear is back in action and after a fantastic interview with Sir Siglerisimo, the FDO himself, I took a rural retreat tio Eagle Ridge Farm, and now I am revitalized, renewed and ready to educate. Educate you say? In what field…Zombie survival of course. The best way to do this visual add. Which is why the 10 things you should see twice gonna be 10 zombie films that could save your life.

The Horde

Is a wonderful horror film with fast rage zombies. it truly shows how a massive group of zombies is the most dangerous. Cops, gangsters, and criminals must ban together against the undead with all they can muster giving a good example of team play.

Mutants

A paramedic team tried in vain to save there latest injury when he turns in to an undead and forces them to do the opposite of there normal jobs. This movie provides very goo insight into the life one will lead when on the movie and trying to survive and locate refuge.

Devil’s Playground

A movie where the zombies are fast. agile, and don’t know the meaning of quit. this movie teaches us one very important lesson do not let in fighting, bickering, or subterfuge  infiltrate your ranks. If it does it must be dealt with quickly and with finality.

Berlin Undead

This movie was a very fun and informative watch showing just how easily one can find ways around an apartment complex to avoid the undead. also how to engineer materials to your advantage. Also this film shows how team work truly will play apart if you are stuck in such a living space with other during the undead outbreak.

Night of the Living Dead

this is a classic traduce on how to survive a zombie outbreak when out man, out gunned, and with limited supplies on hand. This also shows you how hysteria, panic, and subterfuge can break a group. Another valuable lesson is how to not be rash in your plans for escape and survival when the undead horde is at your door.

Zombies of Mass Destruction

this is a film that shows you the true diversity that ones group of survivors can randomly take and how to deal with it, without hurting your chances of survival.

The Dead

This movie is a spectacular example of how to survive in a wide open area filled with zombies, and your supplies are down to what you have on hand. this also shows you how environment can play a huge role in how you choose to take on the undead scourge. whether its escape, hold up and wait, or the offensive purge of the undead all of these are shown and explored with varying degree of success.

Doghouse

This movie is a lesson fused with comedic over tones to soften the harsh reality of a zombie infestation. but this movies most valuable lessons are in keeping up your confidence in face of overwhelming devastation and the desolation that can set in on one during their survival.

Perkins 14

This movie only has one real lesson to teach us but it is something we all my face at one point or another during the zombie outbreak. That is Family, who have fallen to the undead and need to be expunged. a grizzly reminder that they lost, and we have still yet to survive and try to win in face of the odds

Dead Meat

I have placed this movie on the list as not a way to learn to survive but learn what not to do. because if you go about this films way of trying to survive you wont last very long amongst the living..trust me.

 

Noe my fellow Zombie apocalypse survivors These are 10 films that will teach you valuable lesson on how to survive the zombie outbreak, offensive and purge. so please take heed of them and know that when the day comes I will be with you in the resistance and removal of the undead. So I will give an item for item breakdown of my zombie survival gear so until then this is big bear signing out from the den.

 

The Lady Kitteh Curse

So I have come to understand the one horrible downfall of having a feline army, will I be getting rid of said feline army…no but will I be taking action to “Fix” this deficiency why yes I shall. But I am sure you are asking yourself what could be so wrong with a feline army so I shall tell you…HEAT.

I became her outlet, never have I felt so...used

The mating season of cats has come to some of the younger members of my protectorate and needless to say but they are not dealing with it well. Biting the male populous of the feline army(whom are all fixed) does little to turn there attentions from food, lounging, sleeping and more sleeping. SO she does the only thing she can wail. She wails as she walks, wails as she cleans herself, wails even when she scratches or using the litter box.

I don’t know about you and your knowledge of war tactics and such but this does not bode well for secretive, silence tactical insertion into enemy territory let me tell you.

So to finish up, please spay and nuder your pets folks because you don’t want your rise to world domination ended because one of your well trained minions sees fit to pounce upon and commit lewd acts to another of your ranks. And remember Bob Barker would be proud of you.(Fuck Drew Carey *maul*)

Lord knows what has happened to that box lid

Progress, Little by Little

I figured since I have finally gone and updates the last two main pages of my blog, that I would go and do a little update on my writing. I have been in an Online Writing Group since late last year and boy has it help me with my writing. If you are a writer and reading this go to the Forums over at Kelley Armstong and check out the OWG there. The people are fantastic, nice, friendly and brilliant writers nothings unexpected for the fan base of an author the caliber of Kelley.

Since joining this OWG I have gone to writing short fiction and have seen my completion ratio go from like zero to 70-80% and that alone is a fantastic boost to my confidence. Which is the advice I have to give to all the wanna be fiction writers out there, start small and progress, little by little. If you write a 4000-8000 word short story and finish it, and move on to another and another it will help you in your craft and confidence which will make that novel you have stewing that much easier to undertake.

I will try to do another little writing update/advice piece sooner rather than later probably on Critiquing which is something I never did really until my time in the OWG. Well Big Bear is signing off got a desk to build so I can finish my writing room/office/ man cave so until next time.

*Big Bear roars with pride, and a new found confidence and moves back deeper into the den, were the unmistakeable sounds of some sort of construction can be heard*

Things Men Should Know 2: Found In The Sock Drawer

Fellas we all have hidden our treasure trove of playboys, hustlers, that warn out VHS(just dated my self OYE!!), pocket knife, that first sweet hearts picture, and anything else mom wasn’t supposed to find in the sock drawer, box under the bed that loose attic step or any where else our teenage pubescent mind thinks is safe. But as the divines would have it, it is always found some of us lucky to have it found by dad(sadly not me I lived with ALL WOMEN!!) but others of us are found out by mom and of course she freaks and we get “THE TALK”. So in the vein of such manly endeavors I have compiled a bit of advice for the modern man and the sexual activities and desires we all strive to fulfill.

Numero uno the simple catch and release, more men have screwed themselves out of return “fishing trips” with the catch and release. So you have spit your prime game and hooked that special someone and then you go to your place and enjoy the fruits of your labor(mom would be so proud… 😛 ) but then when finished you scoot her up and out and now all her girlfriends who frequent the same establishment you both use bait and tackle will know your uncouth treatment of the most precious natural resource known to mankind…the ladies. As a former Catch and Release fishermen in my college days I found out something so candy it should be illegal for us men to have it at our disposal, drum roll please……cooking, and cleaning. I know its fucking crazy right? Wrong most solo night fishing trips end at the first soft a squishy place you land whether its a couch chair or the kitchen counter top and if there is last weeks pizza splatter on it or a month old pile of chinese food nestled under a cushion you won’t be getting to far. “Cooking?” you say well aren’t you hungry after a epic battle against that prize piece…WELL SO IS SHE DAMN IT! and ramen noodles, easy mac and the occasional micky d’s wont cut it so go visit mom and pick up some pointers my personal favs the fat stuff homemade cheesy mac and cheese with bacon, something baked (preferably before hand) or something quick a salad or chicken or something. you may think less of me but the food network is your little lures friend and who knows she may come back for the pie and bring a friend ;).

On that note the elusive threesome, on that I will say this if you get that chance DON’T SAY SHIT!! your mouth will go 13yrs old on your ass and kill your chances faster than you shot into that sock oh way back when. Just roll with the punches and for god sake curb your enthusiasm or you will find your night ending much earlier than it would have other wise so if the possibility is high get off a quick one before you go out and if you need me to explain that shit then you should definitely be reading this blog post.

Now lastly if you are like me and love the bigger ladies for the love of god don’t be like me and try to hide it(when i was younger ladies i was foolish I’ll admit it), this love of the big beautiful women is nothing to hide in fact be open about it. Those big and beautiful women will make sure your drinks come free(and never stop), that after the fishing is done you will eat well and get a 2nd or 3rd fishing trip that night if you last long enough. also if you find that the strain is to much and fall asleep after trip 1 don’t worry they will make sure you finish the task at hand come the morn and out of all the ladies in this world they WILL tell their friends and aren’t to shy about bringing one over next time you go out(see above for references as to what the hell I am talking about if you are now lost)

Now I know I said above was the last but this has been bugging me for some time and didn’t make it into the first “Things Men Should Know” post. *exhale…deep inhale* ALL YOU FUCKING CLINGY ASS, WHINY BITCHY EXCUSES FOR MEN NEED TO CUT OFF YOUR OWN TESTIES AND CHOKE YOURSELF, THAT IS IF YOU CAN FIND THEM! I am so tired of guys complaining about what their ol’ladies wont do or don’t do anymore when the hell was the last time you gave out a little head to your lady if you want her to return the fucking favor. washed dishes lately? the laundry? any sort of household chore other than sitting on your ass watching the playoffs? It don’t have to be often and it don’t have to be everything at once something here or there will make her loosen up faster than tequila makes her cloths fall off. Being a man entails somethings they don’t cover in sex ed or “THE TALK” and Big Bear is here to dish out the lessons for this class. a relationship is tit for tat, give to get, love to be loved. Not following her around with a hard on like a bitch in heat. Teenagers do that in high school not 20 something’s who claim to be men for the love of fucking god sake.

Alright Big Bear is out hope you learned something and ladies, you weren’t supposed to read this far and since you are here act surprised when he does those things you like no matter what they may be and let him have a taste of the good stuff for his troubles huh? what do you say?

Choices

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You know having been in the military for 5+ years I have had to make some serious and life changing decision but the only victim of the fall out would and was always ME. Yet two years after my separation from the active military service I find myself at an in pass. I have to make a choice that will effect my life, and the lives of those involved in a deep and changing way, and I know not what I must do, not what direction to go. What makes this so hard is, that it holds the fate of a child in the balance whether their life will change around for the better or descend further in to the miasma that has become the young life they lead.

I have many tattoos but the biggest and the one I thought the most about is the one on my shoulders. It says “Choices”, I chose that because I wanted something to remind me and represent the twists and turns in life that we all must face. Never in my wildest moments of deep and spiritual thought did I ever think I would be faced with such a manifestation of this belief of mine. This also brought up another belief of mine that I read about in the teachings of the Taoist philosophy. This part of the teachings was called the way of water, where is says we strive to be like water and go not where we want but where the path in front of us leads and to were we are needed.

Things in life never turn out as simple or uncomplicated as we would like, this fact of life is something that becomes more and more prevalent as I grown older, wiser, and well more like my mom 🙂 the scariest part about that is how right those before us are and I just hope I can keep up with that timeless tradition.

Family

Airborn operations with my fatigue family

This is the time of year where family is the centerpiece to all things. Though many have forgotten this and or have chosen to ignore it for the flashier far more eye grabbing subject matter of what valued item is going to be imparted upon them by loved ones. I know we all do it, but Big Bear is here to spread some holiday wisdom for all to take and use as they see fit.

This advice is, Family. You only have one Family, no matter how idiotic, egotistical, fucked up, or just down right annoying they are, it doesn’t change the fact they are your one and only family. You can add to a family but never take one from.

Blood does not link to bond people together to make them family. Events, circumstances, and feelings all can create family. I want to take a darker look at family for moment because a friend of mine told me that doesn’t like celebrating the holidays with his family because they had suffer great losses during the holidays and that is what drives all of the feelings and conversations during this time of year for them. I thought about this for along time to see what I could offer up to help him and at first I came up with nothing. That night at work while letting my mind wonder I ponder this situation more and I turned on my thinking music or in this case my serious thinking music and the soulful sound of the blue legend B.B. King filled my night at work yet I still came up with nothing then finally as I was getting off work and was gonna admit defeat it hit me like a sack of bricks.

Death does not diminish the bonds we have with those in our family if we simply step back and take a look we can see those we have lost right there within us. Personally I have lost my mother and there I times I feel like I am alone but then I do something like I did this night when trying to help my friend that shows me those bonds with my mother are stronger than ever. What did I do you ask? I listened to B.B. King a habit I picked up form my mother when something bothered her for she needed to think or just needed to buckle down and put in the work she needed to do at the time she listened to him. I wouldn’t her favorite song by him are my favorite songs but his music is like a woven strand of that part of my life with that of my departed mother giving new life to the memories I made with her all those years ago.

So I told my friend to tell his family when they start to cry or feel deeply sadden by there loss that they have nothing to be sad about because that person is still right there with him in the faces of there parents, and children, in the memories left behind by the things still found in their home no matter how small or faded they will come anew with the magic that is this time of year.

When families get together the chinks in the armor begin to show up if you will all the tiny things wrong here or there all the little fault lines begin to show and alot of times it tares families apart. I went to visit family weekend before last and 2 of those shaky lines reared their ugly heads 1) Begin an alcoholic cousin whom I ran into at the barbershop. My instincts( a.k.a my natural mean side) said simply leave him and go about my business but I remembered that he us family and I only have one family and his mother would not approve of me leaving him, so I trudged through the mountains of alcohol slurred retorts and argumentative statements and took him home not with out a lot of repeating my self and creative negotiations however.  Afterward albeit more annoyed and agitated I sudden felt better warmer and all the angst, agitation and anger washed away. That next day I went to see his mother and though her advanced age has claimed much of her memories and mobility she still hugged me greatly and thanked me for taking her of her baby boy even though he is almost twice my age. and that is when I realized just how important and irreplaceable family is no matter their faults.

So please don’t let your family divide let them know there importance not just to you but to everyone in your family this holiday season and maybe you to can partake of this bear warm and fuzzy feelings this year because as I have stated before and you should remember…You only have one family